Art has changed a lot for me this semester. For me, art was only at my fingertips, and I can choose art as a way of expression in the face of any problem. But suddenly, I couldn’t do this. It’s ridiculous: For me, art has become a luxury. I have repeatedly indulged myself not to make active changes to the busy and empty status quo, and I virtually complied. Of course, in the end, you will suffer the consequences.
I wrote in the self-evaluation last semester that I hope that I can be more tolerant rather than blindly making excessive value judgments with my own opinions. This semester is quite the opposite. I almost treat external information and feedback with a “full acceptance” attitude. And, this will cause my negative attitude towards humans to gradually strengthen.
For people, I no longer think that I can be understood, I am not seeking expression, I am not seeking empathy. More generally speaking, I lowered my expectations. I don’t like this, I think it’s like a trend of being smoothed out. very horrifying. Another distinctive feature of this is that I am very tired. I am tired of tolerating all kinds of things happening, not even tolerating, but to containment. I need to give more experience than ever to try to digest and understand. I became bored.
Later, I speculated it as “information overload”-too much information flooded due to my containment, and I obviously couldn’t handle it, but I couldn’t throw it away. It was a bit wasteful. So I can only come to one, deal with one, tear down the east wall and make up the west wall. Fortunately, this kind of thing enough to cause an economic crisis has not caused my mental crisis.
Of course, people can never solve all the problems on their bodies, I knew it early in the morning.
Finally, like the self-evaluation at the end of each semester, bless yourself. I wish myself the courage to create and the awe of art.